The right change at the right time

Susan Tesch, MS, LMFT | Psychotherapy & Counseling

Susan Tesch, MS, LMFT | Psychotherapy & Counseling

Face Time

As I get older, I notice my face…dropping. Gravity happens and my face proves it! And my emotional life has etched itself into my face as well, telling a story about who I am. Sometimes I’m okay with my aging face (like when I’m feeling good about myself) and sometimes I’m uncomfortable with it (like when I’m feeling some shame). You may think that therapists are people who are at perfect peace with themselves, but you are wrong! Therapists are an insecure bunch! I’m at better peace with myself than I used to be, but my war with my “defects” just won’t die (until I do)! 

It’s always been ironic to me that Facebook is a place where you’re guaranteed never to see, nor be seen by another face; you can only see a photo of someone’s face, and vice-versa, at best. But in my profession, all day long, clients look right into my face and I look right back into theirs. What a strange privilege—and burden—to work in the business of faces.

My face is now etched with my life history. It’s easy to see some deep vertical indentations between my eyes. They’re my “worry lines.” Those lines mean I care, but those lines also show I’m an intense person and a worrier. It’s also easy to read when I haven’t slept well. It’s easy to see when I’m happy or sad. It’s all on my face, especially now that I don’t have the resilient, perky skin of my youth!

I guess anyone who has had a difficult childhood, as I have, or you may have had, will somehow wear that pain and shame on their face, especially as they age. Maybe that’s why so many seek plastic surgery and other interventions to hide all of that. I understand that impulse, but I’d rather sacrifice some beauty and wear the face that tells my story. I hope that by being who I am, I can help you be who you are.

To me, authenticity is show-stoppingly beautiful!